The Five Best Girly Apps
This might be the best girly app in the universe. If you’re anything like me, you will have a floordrobe, and you will root around it madly before selecting a skirt and top that don’t match and tights that have a hole in them and fuck you forgot to wash your favourite jumper and it has marmite down it and your cat has fallen asleep inside your boots. This virtual wardrobe has all your clothes how they’re meant to be living it up in the five star luxuary of an actual closet. You can also upload style inspirations which for me include Lauren Conrad, Jennifer Lawrence and Dora the explorer.
These are just handy and all of them are good. I have Pink Pad. Sometimes you’re just too busy being fabulous to work out when your next one is going to be. You just whip out your phone and it will tell you how many days you have left. So if you’ve only got a couple, you know that breaking all your crockery by throwing it at your neighbour’s had because you didn’t like his music was justified. Because you were premenstrual. I was actually very premenstrual today and threw my phone into the Thames. Not the best decision I can admit but my God more satisfying than a chocolate covered donut. This app is also very useful if you have a ‘shit I might be pregnant,’ moment. Not so much for the gay girls, unless your girlfriend is actually that good.
If you haven’t got the mirror app, get it. If you need to see if you have salad in your teeth before you go and talk to the person you’ve fancied for eight months, check in your phone mirror. If you need to make sure your hair is looking perfect for the date you then go on with said person, check your phone mirror. And when you need to make sure your face looks sad enough to dump said person because they live with their mother at the age of 38 and still own over a hundred beanie babies, check your phone mirror.
This basically sorts my life out. I use this so I know what meetings I have, what I have to buy from Sainsburys’ on the way home, what deadlines I have due in, how many tequilas I should be consuming and what my goals are in life once I stop drinking said tequila. It has lists, project organisation and reminders for you so you get off looking at cats and bras on Tumblr and get shit done.
Your bank App
This is boring so it’s going last, but every girl needs this. Needs it. Because if you’re in Topshop, some very weird part of your brain looks at those shoes and thinks ‘Yes, I can afford these, I have the money somewhere,’ and when you look at this app you will realize that no, you actually need to pay your rent and buy food because all you have in your fridge is wine and moisturizer.